Don't Ask Me To Go To Church

"Religion fucked a lotta people up." - Richard Pryor

I really don't get folks who ask me to go to church with them and then get hurt and/or offended when I say no.  Now, at the risk of offending some of my church-going friends - some of whom are church officials, I don't plan on going to church unless it's a wedding. 

My mother, who faithfully goes every Sunday, stopped asking me.  My father-in-law tried to twist my arm to go this Sunday because it's his birthday.  We can have a cake and cook some food over here.  But I'm not going to church.  Sorry, and I would appreciate if you wouldn't put me in an awkward position like that again.

Half the time when parents want you to go, it's because people in their congregation ask them, "Where's your family?"  So they feel this compulsion to produce evidence that they do, indeed, have a son or daughter or grandchildren.  The other half seems to be so they can show you off to their church friends.  Maybe those two are related.  And then there's the belief that they must help you avoid Hell, and they wouldn't be good parent if they didn't do that.  And if there's another category that doesn't fit the cynicism, I apologize for missing it.

What bothers me is how bothered I feel about saying no.  I don't feel like debating how my Soul needs Church to get into Heaven.  I don't necessarily believe in Heaven in the Sky or Hell Down Below After Death.  Heaven and Hell are right here right now, depending on what you're doing.  Unemployed like me for close to a year? Hell.  An explosive orgasm?  Pure Heaven.

Also, I don't believe I need to go to church to find salvation.  I don't even need the Bible to find Salvation.  I believe if you are true to yourself and others, and you treat others as you wish to be treated, you're a long way towards God.  Maybe that's simplistic for some folks.  But I believe the lessons you learn in church are variations on those themes, albeit with more detail in various directions and branches from those directions.

Don't get me wrong.  There may be some utility in church for some people.  I'm just not one of them.  I used to go to church when I was a young man.  I got what I feel I need out of it.  Unless I want a musical show and to watch the original form of rapping, I'd rather stay home and watch football.

Part of my problem with church is demarcation.  The Saved versus the Need-to-Be Saved.  It's almost a moral elitism based on church attendance but then fraught with hypocrisy by the actions outside of the church. 

In some instances, it's the intolerance for other moral or religious philosophies.  I don't believe there is only one way to the Creator.   And anyone who says with complete conviction that there is only one way and that's through church, let the Sun stop shining on that person because that's ludicrous.  We may all feel we have found the answer for ourselves, but we have not found what works for others.  Rather than preach, it might be better if we teach based on our experiences, and what we learned from them. 


But this vibe that one feels it's his/her duty to ask you to come to church is officious.  I don't ask you to come to a bar for a drink, do I?  Why?  Because you might tell me you don't drink.  I'm not going to come down on you for that because that's where you are in your life.  Please don't come down on me for not attending church.

Now, if the contents of this post have offended anyone, please pray on it or for me.  In the meanwhile, enjoy yourself at church while I watch the Raiders.  In fact, while you're at it, pray for Jamarcus.  I might have to.